Going through ads and reading the headlines can be as much fun, if not more than going to the local comedy club. This line is kind of like the first impression, (or second impression if you check out the photo first), so you'd think people would want to make it as appealing as possible, yet they often provide some pretty profound "scratch your head and mutter, what in the world were they thinking?" moments.

I do have to wonder what goes through the minds of some of these people when they decide on a headline. I'm sure a lot of them are nervous and have little experience, but I swear they must have had a few too many "brewskis" before they sat down and put on their little thinking caps.

I will bypass reading certain ads due to the content of the headline. "Lonely Single Dad of Five Seeks Woman" just didn't set off fireworks for me. I'm not quite sure why. "Fathr of Too Brite Childrn Lookn for Companyon" didn't get me all hot and bothered either. (Have you ever heard of spell check, guys?)

"I've got Herpes Simplex." No, I'm not divulging my personal medical historythis was actually a title I saw on one guy's ad. He went on to say that he wanted to be upfront and honest, that half the population has it, so why not get it out in the open. I give the guy an "A+" for honesty and an "F" for snappy pickup lines.

A lot of guys will put their profession in their headline, such as "Hunky Lawyer Seeks Cinderella," "Tennis Star Looking for Love," "Chiropractor Looking to Crack You Up," and "Cardiologist Willing to Give Heart Away." Catchy! And do you notice any similarities? They all make tons of money.

Have you ever seen "Garbage Man Willing to Sweep You Off Your Feet," or "Bus Boy To Service Your Needs," or how about "Box Boy Looking to Bag a Babe." How many people do you think would answer those ads? Not a whole hell of a lot. There are probably a few gorgeous garbage collectors out there but you may want to hold off mentioning your occupation until somewhere in the narrative part of the ad. We're only human, what can I say?
Again, since these people won't get a glimpse of your charismatic, charming personality until you meet, so use whatever ammunition you can to intrigue someone. Since most guys can't understand the significance of putting up a decent photo, they rely on their profession, especially if it's a good paying one, to lure you in. Plus, it's beneficial to put a high paying profession in your headline because women have no idea at this point what kind of car you drive.

If you're answering an ad based solely on the fact that he mentions a professional sports team or anything remotely affiliated with a professional organization; check to see what else is in his ad. (When you find out he's only the vice-president of the fan club, you better hope there's some other good reason why you want to meet him.)